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Should you criticise your pastor?

Published:Sunday | October 13, 2019 | 5:26 AMCecelia Campbell-Livingston - Gleaner Writer

“Sometimes you have to speak the word over yourself.

The pressure is all around but God is a present help.

The enemy created walls, but remember, giants, they do fall

Speak over yourself, encourage yourself in the Lord.”

– Donald Lawrence: the Tri-City Singers – Encourage Yourself

Leadership is never easy, and it is made even harder when persons being led take pleasure in criticising every move that the leader makes.

This is even more disheartening in Christendom, where you have pastors working faithfully, making sacrifices and giving of their best and yet are met with criticism and sometimes even outright resistance from persons who should be building them up in their ministry.

It can be discouraging that those who they should be looking to for encouragement and support are often the very ones who turn on them and tear them apart.

Many church members take delight in finding fault with their pastor and see nothing wrong with it.

But do believers have the right to criticise their pastors?

Family and Religion asked Rev Garry Knowles of the Toll Gate Circuit of Baptist Churches, who shared an experience from his early years as a pastor.

He said that a colleague told him of a criticism one of his members voiced about his leadership. While it didn’t bother him because of who shared it, he said it gave him food for thought as it was all hearsay, leading him to think that there might be others with whom the member was sharing who were afraid of confronting him.

“A reader once asked Billy Graham this question in a post on Charisma News. They explained their circumstance like this: ‘I’m in a civic organisation with a couple of friends from another church, and it seems like all they talk about is their pastor’s shortcomings. Should I say something to them about this?’” Graham answered this question by simply saying, ‘Whatever their reason, it is wrong, and it is a sin in the eyes of God’,” Knowles said he agreed with Graham’s stance.

He said that criticism, in general, is a sin, not just of the pastor.

“Criticism is personal, destructive, vague, inexpert, ignorant, and selfish. Criticism is not a synonym for critique as understood by some, for criticism is judgemental and focuses on finding fault, while critique is descriptive and balanced,” Knowles pointed out.

He said that there was no perfect pastor and that there would always be room for improvement and growth in their teaching, their ministry, and their faith, but for all that, he said, it is not an invitation to criticise, find fault, and put voice to opinion.

“Our pastors have been called to ministry, and we as the body of the church should do all we can to support and encourage them in their roles. They are not faultless, but neither are we, so we should choose to have an attitude of love and grace toward them,” Knowles stressed.

Regarding the issue of disagreeing with or confronting leaders, he said that there are things to consider before doing so.

One important point for Knowles is that the person should ensure that the issue is necessary and won’t end up doing more harm than good.

“Don’t begin with ‘I love you, pastor, but’ … Most pastors will only hear everything after the ‘but’. The prefatory phrase will typically be perceived as insincere,” Knowles said, adding that just as bad is the expression ‘people are saying’. Instead, he said that persons should speak for themselves and not hide behind anonymous cowards.

For Knowles, any good leader should discount or ignore ‘people are saying’ criticisms.

He said that the criticiser should ensure that they really want to hear the pastor’s perspective as for him, too many disagreements are pet peeves or personal preferences.

“If you have a sincere and serious disagreement, you will want to hear the pastor’s perspective. Listen as much as speaking, if not more. Criticising and stating negatives are easy. Critiquing offers a more balanced approach. Most of us are adept at finding problems. If you care about your church and your pastor, you will be willing to offer and be part of the solution,” he said.

For those inclined to criticise pastors, Knowles said they should instead choose to love them well, remembering that they, too, are people who struggle and fall short, giving them the same grace you expect to receive instead of holding them to impossible standards.