Good relationships can bring such pure joy to our lives. For instance, friendships not only make us happy, but they also help to give our lives purpose. In the same breath, relationships can bring the most hurt and pain if we treat them with the nonchalant attitude that 'you only live once' (YOLO).
Last week we stated that getting relationally healthy required us to make three important connections with the people in our lives. We spoke of connecting with the people most important to us as the first connection. Let us now explore the other two central connections.
We all need relationships, because as the Bible tells us, "Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble." Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (NLT).
However, today, it is possible to be surrounded by a lot of people and still feel alone. Loneliness hurts and to escape it, we often treat relationships in a YOLO manner, such as jumping in and out of unhealthy relationships.
Believe it or not, the Church is the best place to create and build satisfying bonds with others. However, it's made up of flawed human beings and you are one. So, we should try to accept that there are different levels of friendships with specific freedoms and responsibilities. All friendships should start at the level of:
i. Acquaintances
This is the person who you might see 'around', that is, every time you volunteer at your church or when you go to a small group meeting. As we get to know these people, some of them may transition from being an acquaintance to becoming a:
ii. Casual friend
A casual friendship can develop quickly, even during your initial contact with an individual. As you discover common interests, activities and concerns, this opens the door for a casual friendship to grow and pass from public information to deeper types of conversation. A friendship should build Godly character in both your lives. Slowly but surely, some of these folks will start to transition into:
iii. Good friends
At this level, you give them permission to have influence over your life. A good friendship is about fellowship. It reflects closeness on an emotional and spiritual level. The Lord instructs us to "... think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works" Hebrews 10:24 (NLT). Good friendships carry with it the responsibility to picture true achievement for one another, physically, emotionally and spiritually. It is not uncommon for good friendships to segue into the deepest level of friendship:
iv. Bona fide friendship
At this level, friends are faithful and loyal as they encourage one another to pursue spiritual maturity. They pray diligently for one another and comfort one another through trials and sorrows. They also have the freedom to correct one another and point out each other's blind spots. This level of friendship is reserved for very few people.
If we take this approach to our friendships, we have the probability of forming great friendships in our lives over time.
The most important connection anyone can make in life is forming a real one-on-one relationship with God. So it is important that we connect those we care about with God.
Acts 20:24 tells us "But my life is worth nothing unless I use it for doing the good work assigned to me by the Lord Jesus. The work of telling others of the good news about God's wonderful kindness and love".
The Bible tells us that we were created to have a relationship with God and no job, person or possession can fill it. The only thing that can fill the God-shaped hole in your life is God Himself.
I challenge you this week to build better relationships. Get connected to your church by volunteering and invite someone to receive God's gift of salvation. Then look for the joy that can come from great relationships.