Sexual bonding or bondage

SEX AS part of a relationship is a part of God’s plan for strengthening the marital bond. Sex cements the bond in marriage physically, spiritually and emotionally. Sex is more than a physical thing, it’s deeply spiritual. When we have sex with someone it creates a spiritual bond that affects our entire life. There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.”

Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us more lonely than ever – the kind of sex that can never “become one”. There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own bodies, these bodies that were made for God-given and God-modelled love, for “becoming one with another” (1 Corinthians 6:16-19, MSG).

MARITAL BOND

When we have sex outside of the marital bond it might feel good in the moment, but it leaves us lonely and eventually affects us emotionally in a negative way. Modern studies are indicating that the more premarital sex we have, the less likely we will be happy in our future marriages, and the more likely that we and our spouse will cheat after we’re married.

God meant for sex to be a blessing and delight, not a burden and disaster. When we don’t honour the way God designed sex to operate, we open ourselves to multiple issues, pain, guilt, and shame. When the sexual relationship is over, there’s a deep emotional breaking in the soul, leaving our souls fragmented.

In some of the broken homes in our society, the violence stems from unresolved emotions from the trauma of previous relationships. Conversely, when we live according to God’s plan, He blesses our sex life. It’s about who’s going to be first in our lives. When we put God first in any area of our lives, He blesses it. To bless means to sanctify, approve, exalt, and consider good. It’s the tangible and intangible favour of God.

GOD’S PLAN FOR SEX

If we want God’s blessing in our lives as a single, married, or single again person, we must live according to God’s plan for sex. If we want God’s blessing on marriage, or on a relationship with someone who we love and value, then we must live by His plan for sex.

Society offers various other plans. There’s the casual sex plan in which someone will get hurt in the short or long run. There’s also the ‘Situationship Plan’ in which there’s ‘testing’ the waters to see if it will work. Again, someone will get hurt in the short or long term. Why? Because there are consequences for being outside of God’s plan.

Ultimately, all the plans out there that aren’t from God’s Word, de-elevate and devalue sex and the human body. They denigrate God’s creation. God created us to be sexual beings; He elevates sex. God elevates us as people. He raises our self-esteem and self-image, and raises marriage to a new standard. 1 Thessalonians 4:1-3 tells us, “Finally, dear brothers and sisters, we urge you in the name of the Lord Jesus to live in a way that pleases God, as we have taught you. You live this way already, and we encourage you to do so even more. 2 For you remember what we taught you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. 3 God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.”