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Kelly's World | Growing up sucks

Published:Thursday | April 5, 2018 | 12:00 AM

Oh man, I'm going through one of those periods again.

Every now and then, I peruse the international news, trying to see if anyone has invented a time machine so I could go back to the '90s.

Better yet, I would need someone to also create some type of vortex that would enable me to then permanently stay in that decade.

Now to be clear, I pinpoint the '90s because I was a teenager then. The only things I had to worry about were doing well in school and whether I could get home fast enough to catch my favourite cartoons. Plus, music just seemed nicer.

I saw a meme the other day that reminded me that growing up 'sucks'. It couldn't be more accurate.

 

When you're a teen

 

When you're a teen, you want to learn how to drive and get your own car.

But when you get the first flat tyre, or the police hand you that first traffic ticket, or the radiator decides to go ka-pow, you wish mommy and daddy were there to carry you wherever you needed to go.

When you're a teen, you crave the time when you get your own place, have your own space, and all that associated jazz.

But when you realise you have the landlord from hell, your National Water Commission bill reflects that your pipe is really Dunn's River Falls, or you eat cup soup three nights in a row for dinner, you might want to head back home.

Recently, some of the financial woes and other issues that come with being an adult befell me, and as the saying goes, when it rains, it pours.

So the issues came one right after another, in alarmingly quick succession. I will be honest with you, I didn't care much for being a grown-up.

While things have abated somewhat, I'm still in a bit of a funk.

So I went on YouTube trying to use music to soothe the troubled mind. In my roving of different genres, I came across some songs I remembered from my Friday nights listening to the weekly Rick Dees Weekly Top 40.

LFO's Summer Girls, Len's Steal My Sunshine and The Cardigans Lovefool definitely added to the nostalgic vibe I was already feeling.

Those songs, despite their flaws (they were cool, but hardly 'masterpieces') took me back to a time when my life was decidedly more simple.

Hence why I'm trying to find that darned time machine and vortex.

 

WISDOM

 

However, one good thing that comes with age is wisdom, or at the very least, knowledge.

So when I hear these young bucks saying they'll never go crazy over one girl, I smirk to myself. I've been on the planet long enough to know they simply haven't met her yet.

I hear young people throwing fits about wanting to move out as soon as they reach 18 or whatever.

My advice? Unless you're sure you can afford all the comforts and bells and whistles of home, sit your impatient derrieres down.

Take it from me, I'm a child of the '90s. Later.

- Link me at daviot.kelly@gleanerjm.com