Keeping your children safe from family predators

Somebody cries in the middle

Of the night

The neighbours hear, but they turn

Out the lights

A fragile soul caught in the hands

Of fate

When morning comes

It’ll be too late

- Concrete Angel, Martina McBride

Sexual abuse is something that most victims find difficult to talk about, and it is even worse when it involves children or young adults.

Many continue to suffer in silence, with the abuse manifesting itself through other actions such as self-cutting, aggressive behaviour, and worse, suicide, leaving family members devastated when they realise, often belatedly, how much pain their loved one was going through.

Antonette Brooks, team leader of the Child Protection and Family Services Agency (CPFSA) in Clarendon, shared with Family and Religion how parents can safeguard their children from such abuse or even if it has already started, how they can deal with it effectively.

Brooks warned that parents and guardians should keep a close eye on their children and be very mindful of in whose care they leave them.

“If they (the parents) are going to work or going out to run an errand, they should ensure that they do not leave an older child to supervise a younger one as parents sometimes do,” she shared.

According to Brooks, in most cases, the perpetrator is someone known to the victim such as a relative or family friend.

It is for that reason that Brooks stressed that parents and guardians should be careful about who they leave their children with.

PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO YOUR CHILDREN

With school being out of session, it is natural for children to want to spend time with their relatives, but Brooks advised that careful consideration should be given in those circumstances because there are sometimes other older children in those homes who are themselves predators.

Citing the COVID-19 pandemic and its effect on the job market, Brooks said that there are some persons now at home who normally would not have been there, and, unfortunately, some of them are preying on children.

“We want parents to bear these things in mind and ensure that you be observant by looking for changes in your child, whether physical or emotional changes. Pay close attention to changes in their behaviour,” said Brooks.

She cautioned that it is very important for parents to ensure that they have an open relationship with their children, where they feel comfortable to talk about anything that may be affecting them.

“Build constant and deliberate rapport with your child so that if anything happens, they feel comfortable talking to you about it,” she said.

More advice from Brooks is for parents to be in constant contact with their children whether they are at home or away visiting.

According to her, parents should always seek to find out how their child’s day was, how things went, and keep the communications lines open. This, she said, would ensure that if anything untoward happens, they do not feel uncomfortable talking about it.

Brooks added that the entire community has a responsibility to see to the protection of children. She encouraged them to make a report to the Office of the Children’s Registry at 888PROTECT, “if you know of or suspect that a child is being abused”.

“As a vulnerable group, children require consistent care and monitoring. We can all help by ensuring their rights are upheld in a way that contributes positively to their growth and development.”