Shellice Tyson shares the joy of being a parent

“We never know the love of a parent till we become parents ourselves,” -Henry Ward Beecher

Shellice Tyson is currently experiencing the same immense love for her handsome baby boy, Caleb. With November being observed as Parent Month, she shared with The Gleaner her journey as a new mother.

Tyson explained that she suspected that she was pregnant when her cycle was late by five days, but kept putting off taking a pregnancy test.

“I knew that something was up because my periods for the past couple months were basically on time and I pretty much had a regular cycle; but I kept denying it and putting off doing the pregnancy test so as to not confirm for sure,” she disclosed. “But when I actually did the test and confirmed, my first thought was ‘Wow! I am really having a baby of my own’.”

Learning experience

That baby has brought joy and according to Tyson, she has learnt a lot from being Caleb’s mom. She explained that when she was younger, she had to babysit her cousins and had experience with feeding and changing them – the typical things that come with taking care of a child. She said, however, that having a little one of her own is much different.

“When you are a parent and holding your first baby for the first time, it feels as if you have never really held a baby before. Life as a new parent, it’s like I am no longer doing things with just my hands, but my heart is fully engaged as well, because I seem to love every single thing that I have to do for my son; if it’s even changing those little smelly diapers,” she said, smiling.

A number of millennials have opted to delay having children because they believe they cannot adequately provide for another life. When asked if she was worried, being a millennial herself, Tyson said feeling unprepared will always be present.

“Irrespective of whether you believe you are financially stable or not, being able to provide all that your baby needs will forever be of concern and at the top of your head. I do not believe you ever really overcome that,” she said, “We all want to give our children the best and, at large, all that we never really had for ourselves. But if we begin to focus more on what they really need, the weight of the worries of running into financial struggles will get lighter.”

These nuggets of knowledge are some of the things she hopes to pass on to Caleb, along with other things she learnt from her aunt and uncle who raised her.

Support

“Greg, my aunt’s husband, was really the father for me. If you ask me, this man was, and still is, ‘the principle man of the world’,” she said proudly. “There was just so much that he taught me that are valuable enough to be passed on to my son, or which can be used in his upbringing. Greg’s teachings were not bounded by time; they are principles that can be applied in years to come and in every place you may go, and these are measures that I will definitely utilise,” she explained.

Tyson further shared that there have been a lot of changes and learning taking place since her son was born. However, she said that finding balance and support are the keys to not becoming overwhelmed.

“Your lifestyle changes a lot because you have to now fit one whole human into your schedule and you will get pretty worked up from time to time, but with the help of my son’s father and the support of others, I have been staying afloat,” she said. “It’s all about finding balance. And this balance has to spread across your life, so balance in your emotions and balance in your work and social/family life,” she noted.

Her advice to other millennials who may feel their biological clocks ticking, is to economise and plan ahead, as we do not know for sure what the future brings.

vanessa.james@gleanerjm.com